Fire Department Responds to Congregation Ablaze

CINCINNATI, OH- Three fire trucks arrived in the parking lot of Christ Our Savior Lutheran Church in Milford, Ohio early Tuesday morning when someone called 911 to report the church on fire.

But firefighters were greeted with some confused employees in the church office and no smoke billowing out of the windows. As it turns out, a neighbor was concerned when he overheard the pastor of Christ Our Savior talking to the cashier at a nearby coffeehouse about the problem his church was having being “ablaze.”

After evacuating the church, firefighters determined there was no fire.

Leaders in the church are hopeful this confusion won’t happen again, but there are no guarantees. At the height of the Pentecostal movement, many fire departments responded to calls by neighbors worried about rumors that the churches were set on fire by a spirit.

Area Church Experiments with New Lenten Kick-Off

ATLANTA- A local Lutheran church will jettison the traditional Ash Wednesday service in favor of something designed to appeal to a wider audience. Pastor of St. Liz Lutheran Church in the heart of Atlanta Steve Carter explains, “We’ve been noticing a decline in attendance at church in general, but our Ash Wednesday service has been particularly disappointing in the past few months. So we’ve renamed it a bit and added something a lilt more familiar to most people than ashes and litanies. The late Johnny Cash is really popular with all generations nowadays. So this year we’re going to celebrate Cash Wednesday instead.”

The approach is getting mixed reviews from members, and some have gone so far as to complain that Cash Wednesday dishonors the dead country star. Others aren’t sure that the emphasis will draw the crowds that Carter hopes it will.

Whatever the result, if the new approach is unsuccessful, it won’t be for lack of planning. “We’re planning to sing ‘Man in Black’ for our opening hymn,” said Carter.

The 43-year-old pastor is no stranger to controversy. In December of 2005, the church sent out mailers to neighborhood homes announcing their alternative approach to Advent fellowship: “You weren’t going to come anyway, but could you at least mail your offering?”

“We sorta had high hopes for it,” said Carter. “It could have worked either as reverse psychology and people would have come because we told them not to, or they would have taken us seriously and mailed offerings. Neither happened. Fewer people came, and we received less in the offering plate.”

But Carter remains optimistic for the Cash Wednesday idea. “What’s not to like? Everyone likes Johnny Cash: grandmas, college kids, suburbanite yuppies.”

Assuming Cash Wednesday succeeds, Carter plans to expand it for next year. “If it goes well, next year, we’ll replace Good Friday with Ring of Fireday. We’ll see.”